You’ve probably landed on this article because the habit of constantly looking at somebody else’s life often results in you feeling not so fantastic about yours.

Did we hit the nail on the head?

And you probably know that just saying to yourself “I really need to stop comparing myself to others” doesn’t really solve the problem, which is why you’re looking for solid solutions to stop.

Comparison per se wouldn’t be a problem if it wasn’t for its consequences. How do you feel after scrolling on Facebook, LinkedIn, or Instagram for half an hour, looking at your friends’ travels, engagements, parties, or office photos? Let’s narrow it to your workplace. Do you compare yourself to your co-workers?

Competition at work more often than not leads to stress. Unhealthy stress in turn can create a toxic environment for you and your colleagues. Toxic environments, where you don’t feel supported or feel inadequate can hinder productivity as well. Fortunately, there are ways to help mitigate comparative thoughts at work and to help you feel engaged and happier on the job.

How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Your Coworkers

1. Redirect Your Feelings

Instead of comparing and focusing on what you don’t have, try to focus that energy to reflect on why you feel that way and where the feelings come from. Ask yourself:

  • What do you admire about your coworker?
  • Were they promoted recently? (Perhaps that means you are feeling the need for your own growth)
  • Do they receive a lot of recognition?

You might be feeling that you need more feedback on your job performance, more motivation from management, more collaboration with colleagues. By reflecting on these moments of comparison and looking inward, you can find out more about yourself and the reasons behind your thoughts.

2. Highlight Your Accomplishments

It is easy to forget about your own accomplishments when you are constantly comparing yourself to those around you. The next time you are feeling these comparative thoughts coming on, grab a notebook and start jotting down what — of the things you accomplished in the last year, month, week, even day — you are most proud of. You will most certainly recognize that you have accomplished more than you realized. This list can also clue you into opportunities for growth and goals that you would like to accomplish in the future.

3. Set Achievable Goals

Competition isn’t always bad. In fact, there are benefits to a bit of healthy competition to help motivate and inspire you and to become more aware of your goals. Reflect again and what strikes you about your coworker, consider how you can get to that goal, and what will help you feel motivated to get there. That person may have traits you admire, but don’t necessarily align with who you are. Goal setting can certainly help you reframe your competitive feelings and help you focus on attainable goals.

4. Spend Time With Your Colleagues

The best way to understand how your coworkers got to where they are, is to ask them. Spend time with them. Ask them out to lunch. Compliment them. By creating new friendships — instead of viewing your coworkers as competition — you can boost your confidence, build your network, and improve relationships. Another way to do this is to ask for feedback on a presentation or project to understand the thought processes of your talented coworkers.

The whole idea of this blog post is like trying to make lemonade out of those lemons life gave you.